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Hidalgo County Herald
Lordsburg, New Mexico
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September 19, 2014     Hidalgo County Herald
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September 19, 2014
 

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6 HIDALGO COUNTY HERALD FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 19, 2014 #WhyIStayed Tweets that everyone needs to see Submitted by EL REFUGIOISilver City By JARED KELLEPJmic.com Recently, TMZ released a damning video of Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice's violent attack on his then-fiancre Janay Palmer in February. The brutal video showed Rice knocking Palmer unconscious before dragging her out of an elevator. On Monday after- noon, the Ravens got rid of Rice, and the NFL announced he had been suspended indefi- nitely. While many cheered the NFL's move to (finally) punish Rice's vicious behavior, too many media outlets immedi- ately fell into a tired pattern of victim blaming. "Let's not all jump on the bandwagon of de- monizing this guy," said Fox News contributor Ben Carson. "He obviously has some real problems, and his wife obviously knows that, because she subse- quently married him." Writer Beverly Gooden had heard enough. "I was Watching the responses to the TMZ on my timeline, and I noticed a trend. People were asking 'why did she marry him?' and 'why didn't she leave him,'" Gooden told Mic. "When I saw those tweets, my first reaction was shame. The same shame that I felt back when I was in a violent marriage. It's a sort of guilt that would make me crawl into a shell and remain silent. But today, for a reason I can't explain, I'd had enough. I knew I had an answer to everyone's question of why victims of violence stay. I can't speak for Janay Rice, I can only speak for me." Gooden decided to change the conversation. She called on her followers to share their sto- ries of domestic abuse with the hashtag #WhylStayed in an effort to draw awareness to the com- plexities of domestic violence. I tried to leave the house once after an abusive episode, and he blocked me. He slept in front of the door that entire night. #WhylStayed I stayed because I thought love was enough to conquer all. #WhylStayed I stayed because I was halfway across the country, isolated from my friends and family. And there was no one to help me. #WhylStayed You think you know but you have no idea. #WhylStayed "I want people to know they are not alone and that there are people who truly understand what they have gone through," #WhylStayed Because I was 15 and he said he loved me and I didn't know what love was. I thought I had to marry him. It was my fault. #WhylStayed Domestic violence isn't a rare phenomenon in America. kccording to the National Coa- ition Against Domestic Vio- nce, an estimated 1.3 million Jomen are victims of physical ssault by an intimate partner ach year, and 1 in every 4 omen will experience domes- c violence in her lifetime. But these are just numbers, onsidered in the abstract, with- Letters to the Editor The Hidalgo County Herald urges readers to voice their opinions by writ- ing in. Letters can be mailed to 212 E. Mo- tel Drive, Ste. B, or can be e-mailed to hcherald @ aznex .net. Letters should include ideas, viewpoints, criticism and news analysis that encourage discussion on issues that have an impact qn the community. Facts must be annotated. Letters that contain information that cannot be easily verified, libelous statements or name calling will be rejected. Letters should be no longer than 250 words. An author may have a letter or guest opinion every 30 days. ut faces and names. It Bad guys can't win houldn't take a brutal video to aake people care about domes- .c violence. All to often, it takes he spectacle of violence to mrust an issue endured in si- said Gooden. "When the over- lence and solitude into the na- whelming public voice is of tional spotlight. shame, you can get lost in the "It is never as simple as walk- guilt. You can feel voiceless. I ing out of the door," said Gooden. want people to know that they "There are so many layers to do- have a voice! That they have the mestic violence. And not just fi- power. That's so critical, that sur- nanciai, although those are valid. vivors feel empowered." But we are talking about human Gooden's message reso- hearts. It's not easy toleave some- nated. Within a few'hours, thou- one you love. It's not easy to sands of Twitter users were shar- leave when you have no resources ing their stories, and nowhere to go. It's not easy Because he made me believe no to leave when you are threatened one else would understand, with additional violence. It's not #WhylStayed easy to leave when you remem- I was determined to make it work, ber how it used to be, or when wanted kids to have their dad, they romance you during the convinced myself that what he good times, or when they prom- did to me wasn't affecting them ise it is the last time. Or when #WhylStayed there are children involved. Be- My morn had 3 young kids, a mort- cause you believe in love and gage, and a PTjob. My dad had you believe in them." a FT paycheck, our church be- Domestic Violence can hap- hind him, and bigger fists, pen to anyone of any race, age, #WhylStayed sexual orientation, religion or Because my word was the only gender. It can happen to couples evidence, who are married, living together, #WhylStayed dating, same sex relationships. Because after being stuck in an Domestic Violence affects people abusive relationship for awhile I of all socioeconomic back- started to believe I deserved all grounds and education levels. of it. If you or someone you know #WhylStayed are in need of information or as- I believed I deserved it sistance contact E1 Refugio, Inc., #whyistayed A domestic violence agency that I knew my future children didn't offers support/assistance to Grant #whyileft & Hidalgo Counties, (575) 538- b/c he never hit me and I didn't 2125, 1-888-538-2125, Emaih think verbal abuse and emo- agencyinfo@eridv.org, tional manipulation was consid- Facebook- E1 Refugio, Inc. Casa ered an abusive relationship. Carmel. Website- www.eridv.org. ncer... Learn if you are at risk with the RightPath Health Screening Options: ABDOMINAL ULTRASOUND SCREENINGS Liver Kidney Gallbladder Pancreas Spleen Abdominal Aortic Aneurysm CARDIOVASCULAR SCREENINGS Heart Ultrasound Atrial Fibrillation Stroke Screen (Cartoid Artery Ultrasound) Thyroid Ultrasound Peripheral Arterial Disease (PAD) ALL 11 screenings for only $200.00 PLUS...Blood Pressure, Pulse and Blood Oxygen Saturation Level are included FREE with all health screenings J Lordsburg Chamber of Commerce 206 Main Street, Lordsburg Appointment Necessary/ I I www.cathedralhealthservices.org/screenings.htm HEALTH SCREENINGS JV'ow.you know. Dear Editor, I agree poor judgment was exercised by the bucketful this past evening of August 22 when a high speed vehicle pursuit con- cluded in Silver City after span- ning a harrowing 120 miles across three counties. The 18 year old suspect that instigated the pursuit clearly lacked any ability to pro- cess logical thinking, as plainly exhibited by his lunatic decision to flee rather than stop that night. The officers that responded to the pursuit did what was needed in order to neutralize the dangerous situation before any- one was killed. Regrettably, a Deming sheriff's deputy was in- volved in a collision with another car with 2 women and 3 children in the vehicle while responding to the pursuit as it approached the officer's jurisdiction. I want to take this opportunity to point out to the critical public eye that this accident would not have taken place if the 18 year old suspect had not chosen to run from the officers in the first place. Then the pursuit would not have taken place at all. However, it did. It is a trendy, troubling be- havior our society seems to revel partaking of, to question and criticize the actions taken by highly trained law enforcement officers to control and contain dangerous, potentially fatal situ- ations. For myself, I think our of- ricers need every advantage we can provide them from pay in- creases to military grade weap- onry to armored vehicles. I'm for all those things, due to the unde- niable fact the bad guys already have these things and won't'hesi- tate to use.them against us, the honest citizens, or our law en- forcement officers who defend us against them. MAKE YOUR VOICE HEARD! REGISTER day to register to Vote in i Ithe November 4, General Election isI I OCTOBER 7 I I Visit the Hidalgo County Clerk s | I Office for detailsI So I have no trouble accept- to be more concerned with the ing how many officers were in- people who would not let the volved in the pursuit that honest citizens defend them- evening. The safety of potentially selves. We need to be more con- hundreds of people was placed in cerned about the people who jeopardy that night between the don't want police officers to other drivers on the road and their question people or chase them passengers on board, plus the resi- down when they run away and dents that live near the roadways, certainly don't want police to plus any pedestrians out and be able to use force when nec- about within the towns, plus our essary. Because if we don't al- own officers. The bad guys cannot be al- low police the mode and the lowed to win--now or never. If means to accomplish their sworn criminals are allowed to break duty to protect law abiding citi- laws and endanger the safety of zens, wait and see just how fast others without fear of capture and modern day society will unravel. Just try to go about your day to punishment, just who do you think will be on the losing end of day routine knowing that you this deal? I can promise you it stand every chance of becom- won't be the law breakers because ing a victim of crime and the they will be able to perpetrate all criminal will not be captured sorts of crimes from theft to mur- and if criminals can't be cap- der because some people think tured, they can't be punished. we should not let police do their So what's to stop them? job. Say what? Respectfully, I don't believe it's our police Kim Tankersley we need to worry about. We need Making time for my grandkids By DR. HOSEZELL BLASH/ Animas It's the hope of most grand- parents to have a bunch of grandkids. And rightfully so, be- cause grandkids often have their way with grandpar- ents. I plan to return home soon to see the grandkids for I miss them dearly. I greatly miss the kids shouting, "Grandpa! Grandpa! Grandpa!" And the shouting gets louder and more fre- quent throughout the day. I also miss the kids' growth and matu- rity patterns. Let me tell you about my kids. Brandon is the firstborn and he served as a "guinea pig" for us to learn about "babyland". He was born during the latter part of the 1960s when the song, "My Michelle" was popular. His mother is named Michelle. Brandon grew up as a typi- cal student, not motivated to do his best academically. Mostly, was a social animal who was mo- tiva edby his solcal d "frien l ': He is an adult now and things that he rules the universe. And there is Christian and Jenal, who were born to my baby daughter, Kenra Marquita. Christian's birthday started off as a near disaster. As Martha and I gathered around the showcase in the pediatric ward to see him, the nurse in charge showed us Chris- tian. "Wow! What a fine little boy," I said. Martha said, "I wish I could hold him." We took photos that would the first impression. "Wait, wait one moment," said the nurse. "I have given you the wrong baby and I'm greatly sorry about this!" This was a great disappoint- ment to Martha and me because we had already fallen in love with the little boy. Then, the nurse showed us the real Christian. And we had to learn to love a new baby all over again! We took a careful look at Christian and thought he was a cool little boy. Christian, to my amazement, was completely stark naked with a red body. We took pho- tos and prayed the nurse was right this time! Christian is an active kid who re- cently turned 11. He's academically astute and loves sports and played in the band. Chris- tian was very hap- pen when Jenal was born. This would rid him of some of his loneli- ness. Jenal, the last child born to Glen and Kendra, is the only girl in the family and the last grandkid. She likes to play tricks on grandpa! One day I met the family halfway between West Palm Beach and Daytona Beach, Florida. Suddenly, Kendra said that tfiey had a p oblem and' couldn't meet me. "What? Are you kidding?" I asked. "No, we can't come," stated Kendra. I was still talking on the cell phone when I spotted Jenal ap- proaching my car. "Look, look grandpa, I got new shoes!" Jenal said. "Hello, hello grandpa. I love you !" We kissed and chatted before we left for our homes, going our separate ways. "Goodbye Grandpa, Goodbye Grandpa!" Dr. Hosezell Blash can be reached by email at hosezellblashl @ aol. corn Historic Panoramic Photograph for sale Lordsburg 49 "x 8 " printed on foam core board--can be framed or displayed without a frame. Can be seen at the Hidalgo County Herald. Call Edmund Saucedo at 575-542-9716 We have all the tools to keep your Business Inc We offer Professional Services for all aspects of your small business! luding: # Payroll #Monthly, Quarterly & An Tax Preparation nual # Financial Statements # Bank Reconciliations 575-542-3125 212 E. Motel Drive * Suite A * Lordsburg I